Tuesday, July 17, 2012

I Got Kicked out of Brownies

I’ll cut to the chase, I got kicked out of Brownies.

On my first night.

Doesn’t everyone?

You might say “Rogue Degenerate” but I’d like to think “Songstress in the Making”.

Read on, you might be surprised (or not).

I had been begging my parents forever (probably not but when you’re young, things seem like forever) to spend Thursday evenings singing and dancing.

My parents were either impressed with my maturity or it was just a coincidence that my cousin Gillian handed down her brownie outfit to me.

Either way, I was about to experience that of my wildest dreams… Brownies! Oh to be (around) seven again.

On that fateful sunny evening, I couldn’t have been more prepared;

  • Faded and too large outfit: Check,
  • Scratchy, brown wool leggings: Check,
  • Scarf that was strangling me: Check,
  • Pouch with payoff quarter: Check.

Things were shaky from the beginning.

I was greeted by this person that called herself a Witch “Owl” and she wanted myquarter (and we all know what I’m willing to do for a quarter). It was pretty much a game of pull and tug.

I lost.

The torture didn’t end there.

Through some twist of fate, all my friends were put into the “Little People” group and I was stuck with the “Fairies”. Apparently my dismay was quite obvious as the real degenerate one of my peers gave me the secret verse that would enable me to join my friends.

Looking back now, I can’t see how her idea would have had any other outcome than what it did but that’s the way the cookie crumbles.

And so, when it came time to hold hands, skip around a circle and sing “our” song, I was ready. I can remember it like it was yesterday and it went like this…

“We are the Fairies glad and gay, helping people with their day.”

My version…

“We are the Fairies glad and glum, helping people with their bum.”

I didn’t really want to be a Brownie anyway.

Got any Brownie stories of your own?

Get Caught up in the Series, it’s Addictive!

8. I Tore my Knee Cartilage While Highjumping,,
7. I got Migraines to Avoid Ballet,
6. I Cut off all my Hair and gave it to Barbie,
5. I Got Kicked out of Brownies,
4. I Pooped My Pants,
3. I Almost Sold my Brother for 25 Cents,
2. I Was Adopted,
1. I Was Born.

2 thoughts on “I Got Kicked out of Brownies

  1. Savvy Suburban Mama

    Seriously, you had me laughing out loud. I can just picture it. I was your opposite, kind of. I was a brownie and I guess I got too old for it and they wanted me to be a girl guide. We didn’t want to be girl guides. I got pushed out of brownies. Looking back, probably a good thing. Brown wasn’t really my best colour, and I’d run out of badges I could actually get, so no accessorizing anymore.
    .. crumb.. your song is stuck in my head now.


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