Monday, June 17, 2013

How to Not Cook a Fried Egg

One thing I learned early on with this whole blogging thing is to write about what you know.

Another thing I learned is that following the rules all the time, can be boring and let’s be real, tilting at windmills is my specialty.

That’s why, when my good friend, Shayna over at Mommy Outside suggested that we do a Guest Post Swap on eggs, I was all in!

Before, you check out her appetizing recipe post for Spinach, Egg and Feta Pockets, see what I have to say about…

How to Not Cook a Fried Egg.

Here at The Zoo, we love eggs. A lot. For awhile, we were going through two dozen a week and Ed and I were only accounting for a few of those.

Now, before you get all horrified and tell me that so many eggs are bad for you, I’ve already heard it and you’re too late.

Regardless, eggs come from chickens and chickens taste good (and can even be considered cute by some people) so if A + B = C than A + C = B. And let’s not forget about all the protein.

As far as my calculations are concerned, eggs are good.

Back to the purpose of this post.

When I tell you that I can’t cook, I’m not exaggerating. Until one year ago, I was the Mistress of all things boiled water; rice, coffee, kraft dinner, couscous. The list goes on.

However, my mothering instincts eventually kicked in and I found out that scurvy is not pretty on the teeth so I bought one of those Pampered Chef Steamers (well worth the money and I’m frugal. Note that this is an unsolicited endorsement) and learned how to turn on the oven.

And after two years of hard work… I can NOT cook a fried egg!

Picture of Broken Egg on The Floor

 Do Your Eggs End Up Looking Like Mine?

 

Be sure to watch for next weeks cooking post on How to make a Fallen Soufflé.

My photography skills are similar to my cooking skills. In turn, Shayna took the picture for me. Isn’t she talented.

Note that eggs may not prevent scurvy.

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15 thoughts on “How to Not Cook a Fried Egg

  1. Tammy

    after many years of cooking eggs, I can finally do over easy with very few now that break..lol Can’t wait for the souffle!! if you can figure out meringue let me know..lol

    Reply
  2. Sarah

    Lol! This was a great post…made me laugh because I can definitely relate! My Pampered Chef steamer has been such a lifesaver 😀 Also… I found out you can cook eggs in the microwave. It’s saved my butt on the mornings I’m too sick to cook but my daughter still wants eggs 🙂

    Reply
  3. Sandy A

    LOL you two crack me up (just had to say that!)…but seriously, this had me laughing. I can totally relate, Sarah! I’ve only started cooking learning how to cook in the last 2 years. Thanks for such a fun post..will have to check out Shayna’s recipe now. Love the pic btw 🙂

    Reply
  4. stephanie

    Eggs are good today, bad tomorrow…no one really knows. My view on life is that when it’s over, it’s over. Whether it comes from eating one too many eggs, or from being run over by an ice cream truck – when your clock runs out it runs out. May as well make the most of the time you’re here!

    Reply
  5. Dawn L.

    This is hilarious! It reminds me of The Exploding Egg Incident that took place when my brother and I were hanging out in the kitchen in our teens, making breakfast.

    My brother set out to fry an egg in a small cast iron pan. In typical fashion, he had the burner cranked to “high” heat, so when he cracked the egg open and dropped it in the pan, it sizzled for about 10 seconds before a loud BANG!!! rang out. The yolk exploded and shot straight in the air, past his face, and hit the ceiling fan that was slowly rotating above. He maintained his even expression – only his eyes moved, following the yolk’s trajectory from the pan to the fan blade, where it stuck.

    I don’t think I have ever laughed so hard in my life!

    Reply
  6. Pingback: Spinach, Egg & Feta Pockets {Recipe} - Outside The Box

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