Saturday, June 14, 2014

What Do You Do When Telemarketers Call?

Rotary Phone TelemarketersIf you’ve ever owned a phone then you’ve probably received a phone call from a Telemarketer. I have and I didn’t even have a phone. Try to figure that one out.

This post isn’t meant to bash Telemarketers because we all know that they’re just trying to make a living and feed themselves. However, that doesn’t mean that they don’t annoy the poop out of us. More on that in a moment.

We’ve been seeing an increase in calls (and no it has nothing to do with me entering contests) so I thought that I would try and come up with some strategies. Clearly having the kids scream at the top of their lungs did nothing to deter them because they called one and a half hours later. So I did what every sane person would do and I posted a question to my Facebook Page.

Speaking of which, if you don’t follow me on Facebook, why? Don’t answer that question unless I really need to know. Instead, hop on over to my Facebook Page and like it. Okay. I’ll wait.

Drums fingers.

Kills Mosquito.

Gets glass of water.

Many of you were willing to come to my aide. The ideas came pouring in. The only problem is that with each new one came a snort and with each snort, water came out my nose. I’d like to thank you for your ideas. But not the the water coming out the nose. That’s no laughing matter.

Any hoo, your comments were so priceless that I just had to share. Here are some of my favourites, in no particular order…

  1. Tell them you have to poop,
  2. Give the phone to your kids after telling them it is Santa calling early,
  3. Say you’re the home owners mistress and not allowed to make financial decisions,
  4. Pull a Seinfeld episode. Tell then you are busy and ask for their number so you can call them back later,
  5. Tell them that the only credit card you have is for work. When they tell you that’s okay, ask if they accept special credit cards from police stations,
  6. Tell them that they’ve called in the middle of an investigation are are now a witness,
  7. Pretend to speak a foreign language Knowing my luck, they’d speak Spanish,
  8. If it’s something like air duct cleaning then say the ducks flew away Or say that the refrigerator is running and you have to go catch it,
  9. Tell them you don’t have a phone,
  10. Play 20 questions. Starting with their age, where they live, favourite colour, what they’re wearing. Ask them one after the other so they don’t have time to respond.

So, chime in.

What Do You Do When Telemarketers Call?

Hopefully no Telemarketers were harmed in the writing of this post.

Thanks to Chelle for the photo.

33 thoughts on “What Do You Do When Telemarketers Call?

  1. Kirsten

    We have our phone number on the National Do Not Call List. This has helped a lot! We don’t have any telemarketers calling us. you get the odd one, but i just politely decline and then hang up.

  2. Ali P

    Get rid of the home phone! lol.. Since getting rid of ours, the telemarketing calls have pretty much stopped. I do get the odd one on my cell, but not very often.

  3. Freda Mans

    Oh what a laugh. I generally get into an odd debate about something random. They hang up on me first more often than not.
    I think I’ll try backwards obscene calling next time. They call and I’ll breath heavy and moan. 😉
    Freda Mans recently posted…The Friday 56My Profile

  4. Elva Roberts

    I asked them for their phone number and said I would sic the police on them because I was on a ‘no call’ list. The guy got really upset but I don’t think he called me again.

  5. Kayla @ TheEclecticElement

    I’m unfortunately too nice for my own darn good and I sit there and talk to them. Although I will say if I had any kids or any kids walking in my vicinity, I’d TOTALLY tell them it’s Santa and let them go to town 🙂

    Some of those strategies are TOO funny!
    Kayla @ TheEclecticElement recently posted…Win It Wednesday(6/4)My Profile

  6. Rene

    I really feel for telemarketers – what a crappy job, and one that I don’t think people would do out of choice. 😉 Get call display. I never answer a call from a number I don’t recognize. Pair that with voicemail and you have it made!

  7. Sandy

    I usually don’t answer those calls, but when I do, I just interrupt them, tell them I’m not interested, and please take me off their list. I cut to the chase. It may be a bit rude but, it stops them right away and they don’t waste any more of my time…or theirs! I do feel sorry for those having to do the job though. My first job was as a telemarketer…I lasted one week. Couldn’t stand it. Love this list, Sarah!! Made me laugh 🙂
    Sandy recently posted…Canadian Musicians! This Could Be Your Big Break!My Profile

  8. Jenn

    I love toying with duct cleaners. “No ducks, what’s your rate on geese?” gets them every time. As for the computer scams…I just tell them I don’t have a computer. or if I’m feeling really dramatic I will say “Oh my goodness Frank it’s the government.. they know what you’re planning. Abort abort!!!!”. (No frank in the house…).strangley they never want to talk after that.

  9. HEIDI C.

    I never answer the phone if the number is unrecognizable. We have an answering machine for serious callers to leave messages.

  10. Stephanie Corchado-C.

    Just skipped over to check you out from and I must say that I could stay here and just check out the fun stuff you have for hours..but to get to this topic…

    My boy/girlfriends (they must be in a serious relationship with me for they call me several times each day!) call me from ADT (as I said) several times most days. I have started telling them (just as soon as they say who they are and what company they work for) that I am neither a home owner or credit card holder and my pit-bulls and .38 Special are all the protection I need…the see that I am calling from KY and assume that I am a crazy lady! Some, however do not stop there…I then tell them that my boy Buck says that if they call again he’s gonna track them down with said pit-bulls…

    I don’t have any pets, don’t own a gun, and am not related to any “Buck” but I get a kick out of it! 🙂

  11. Amy Lovell

    Haha love those ideas!!! I ususally just dont answer and than I block the number so they cannot call me again!


    I use to say right away not interested and then hang up, but now since we got rid of our house phone no more pesky calls

  13. Amy Lovell

    It depends on if its just a survey or they are selling me something. If its a survey depending on the length I may do it! If they are selling something I hang up! As long as I get their # I can add it to my reject list and they will never be able to call again!!! MUHAHAHAHA!

  14. Elizabeth Matthiesen

    I do feel sorry for the poor people having to do this job, they must suffer an awful lot of abuse when they call. Asking to be removed immediately from their calling list doesn’t seem to have helped any. Now I just say not interested and hang up, saving both of us time.

  15. Elva Roberts

    I usually hang up when I hear someone mangling my name. I did, however, tell one fellow that I wanted his number so I could sic the police on him. He was extremely agitated and sputtered for a while. He did not call again for a long time but I am still getting calls. I just hang up.


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